Antimater
by Soomin
Summary: All Apollo wanted was a little bit of reassurance. Klavier didn't know where to start.


Even in high school, Apollo was never one for reading tabloids. There were constant debates of what was true and what was false, and while Apollo was sure that there was some truth underneath all of it, it was just too much effort to keep track of it all. Scandals, candid photos, parties, hook ups – all of it was just attention-grabbing rumors. A lot of his classmates in high school and college loved them, but he was more focused on his academics than to pay attention to some B grade celebrity and their social life.

Then he started dating Klavier, and he suddenly he couldn't get away from them. However, as per Klavier's advice, he tried to ignore it and prayed that they just went away.

There were a few, Apollo found, that were just plain mean to him because he was Klavier's boyfriend, Apollo found that if he just ignored it, they were relatively harmless to his self esteem. He was never one for fashion or make up or having a lot of money. He was a defense attorney, and he was damn good one too. He didn't really care if a twenty-something year old woman typed daily about his outfits and how Klavier was too tall for him to make it work or anything. Everything was fine. Who cared if Joe Schmoe from New York wrote to his readers that Apollo had a huge forehead and was probably the unsexiest thing to walk on this Earth? Not Apollo. He was fine.

One of these days, he was going to remember to forget his bracelet.

Klavier approached him on the topic when they first became heated, but Apollo refused any additional action. It was really not work the trouble. He had to get used to it somehow anyways. Tabloid fads came and go, and the media was just in a dry heat for some dirty secrets. Besides the rare jabs at his physical appearance, Apollo found that he could handle the tabloids. His true animosity was directed to the late night talk shows.

For whatever reason, getting lawyers to talk about their latest scandalous murder cases on late night shows was all the rage at the moment. Apollo can still remember a time where law was a job snooty rich people did. As both a rock star and a popular prosecutor, Klavier was often called upon for interviews. He often offered to invited Apollo with him, but Apollo would much rather watch his boyfriend in the comfort of his own home than in a studio crowded with people that wished him dead.

Apollo watched every interview. Not because he thought that they were interesting, but he always found it interesting how Klavier performed. Different Klaviers came out at different times depending on his mood. Sometimes it would be now-solo singer Klavier Gavin, and others it would be Prosecutor Gavin, the scourge of the courtroom. Sometimes they would mix. Sometimes they would be totally independent. Depending on who came out, Apollo would know whether or not to order some late night take-out.

Tonight, Klavier was on one of the more popular channels talking about his latest murder case. It was about a woman who was accused of murdering her significant other for insurance money. The murder was an icicle that melted in the boiling pot of pasta she was cooking for dinner. At some point, the judicial details were coming through, and the host transitioned into something a bit more digestible for the entertainment crowd.

Apollo smiled to himself as he noticed a slight frown on Klavier's face when the host made the transition. If there was something that Klavier enjoyed, it was talking about the gritty details of the case. However, the host had other things in mind. It was time for the prosecutor to leave and the rock star to come out. He quickly dropped the frown and brought out a blinding smile and laughed at some joke the host made.

"So Mr. Gavin, I have been seeing your face around a lot, and I mean a lot. Let me just show you what my house looks like right now," the host began, showing a kitchen full of Klavier's face covering just about every surface. Klavier made some kind of funny retort, and Apollo briefly wondered how he would react if Apollo would do the same. Maybe Ema would help if she knew it would horrify him.

"I mean, I can't even go out and get some coffee without seeing Klavier Gavin on the coffee cup! But recently, I saw this." He brought out a familiar magazine cover that had Apollo's face covered by an umbrella as the two of them walked through the park. He knew he heard a click in the bushes.

"Isn't that sweet?" the host asked, and Klavier smiled fondly at the photo. "I mean, I could just get diabetes from looking at this photo."

It was one of their more casual dates. It was after one of Klavier's case, and the two of them went out for coffee. It started to rain, and out of nowhere, Klavier produced an umbrella and the two of them began to preform a bad rendition of _Singing in the Rain_.

"Ah, this was a good week. Normally I cannot get _schatzi_ to do something like this with me."

"Now, I don't mean to pry, but this is probably the first time I saw you with someone. Now, as a celebrity-"

"I am a lawyer, Herr Haust. I took a very long test about the laws you know," Klavier joked with a warm smile. Apollo always joked that despite his looks, Klavier was a very tame celebrity. Klavier always retorted back that it wouldn't really look too good as a lawyer to be someone that constantly disturbed the peace.

"Yes, yes, of course. However, just what is the sort of person that makes Klavier Gavin, star prosecutor and platinum song writer, want to walk in the rain throught the park and, I quote, 'sing off-key musical numbers'?"

"Ah well, he is a very loud person to be frank," Klavier began. Apollo rolled his eyes. " But he is very perceptive and understanding. We talk about everything with each other, unless we have a case together of course, though since we're together, we don't have too many of those. He can be very sweet too. He apparently watches all of my interviews." Then the fop looked into the camera and waved as if he was right in front of him. Apollo was glad no one was around to see him blush.

"Right, but what about Apollo's…" the host made some vague outline of a man, "do you like the most. Now, we're still PG, so careful with language." The joke got a laugh from the audience, and for a brief moment, Klavier looked surprise. That got Apollo's attention.

"Hmm, there's just so much to like about him," Klavier began, his eyes glossing over as they do when he's searching for something to say. "His eyes are very intense, even if his hair does pull away from the intimidation."

"Aw, Mr. Gavin, come on! Give me the good stuff. Apollo isn't really your Hollywood stud, so what makes him so irresistible?"

"Uh, well…" now Klavier looked uncomfortable? Could the man really not think of one physical trait that? Apollo knew he wasn't conventionally hot, but he didn't think he was that bad looking.

"Oh, I see," the host said coyly. His eyes went down, and Klavier quickly took the suggestion and smiled.

Apollo's bracelet tightened, and Apollo turned off the TV. He went straight to bed leaving the phone untouched and a menu nearby.

The next morning, Apollo found Klavier knocked out on the couch. It took a moment for Apollo to remember that he had locked the bedroom door. The rock star draped himself over the sofa as he uselessly covered himself with his jacket. Apollo took a picture of the scene with his phone, and then went into the kitchen to make breakfast.

After a night's rest, Apollo realized that while it kind of bothered him that Klavier didn't say anything, it was probably just him figuring things out. As cool as the prosecutor was on stand, he often found himself tongue-tied when talking about Apollo. Mostly because Apollo had a strict set of rules on what can and can't be done in front of the public.

Klavier was only quiet because he was thinking, right?

" _Anata_?" a groggy voice called out, and before Apolo realized, long arms were wrapped around his waist.

"Morning," Apollo cheerfully greeted.

"You locked the door," Klavier commented.

"I felt it was a suitable punishment."

"Ah, you were watching then. Sorry, I didn't realize that my smile was off the list."

"What's the sexiest thing about me?"

"What?"

Apollo felt his throat tighten. He didn't like how the arms unwrapped themselves. He didn't like the uncertain tone Klavier spoke with. This was real Klavier coming out.

"Last night, that host guy asked you what was the most attractive thing about me, but you didn't answer. I'm just curious," Apollo clarified. Klavier stared at him for a moment. He was going through dialogue trees.

"Klavier," Apollo called, stopping the calculations from running. Klavier glanced at the bracelet, and he sighed.

"Truthfully? Nothing, but please wait!"

Apollo almost dropped the cup of coffee he was drinking. To hear that your own boyfriend didn't think you were attractive was a real blow to his self-esteem. His bracelet didn't shrink, and Klavier, the one he fell in love with, was speaking.

Apollo put down his cup and stared him down.

"Explain."

"I'm asexual."

"Oh."

" _Ja,_ I'm sorry I didn't bring it up earlier, it was just – it really hasn't been a huge problem in my relationships before, and it wasn't a really big deal, so I thought that you really didn't have to know about it."

"Wait, so all the times that we've-"

"No!" Klavier exclaimed. "No. I'm not repulsed. I just don't really think about people like that. So when you talk about looking sexy I, well, I really don't have any sort of comment."

Apollo stared at Klavier who looked equal amounts of desperate and terrified.

"But," Apollo began, thankfully breaking the silence between them. "But, you're like some kind of sex icon or something. How do you not know?"

At that, Klavier smiled. "Managers, crew members, magazines, I know what conventionally sexy is. Show a little skin, be physically tone, maybe a tan depending what country you're in, it's all in the mathematics." Then he leaned in. "Though it is nice to know that my careful analysis has paid off." Apollo pushed him away, and Klavier tried to hide that it didn't hurt too much.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"What do you mean?"

Apollo sighed in frustration, and Klavier looked desperately clueless.

"You being asexual. You knew that I was bisexual, and I always assumed that you were gay, but I guess not."

"That hasn't ever bothered me," Klavier explained.

"Still. It isn't right for me to just assume something like that when it's wrong."

"But it's not that important to me," Klavier clarified further and wrapped his arms around Apollo again. This time Apollo didn't push him away.

"People like putting labels on others. It makes things easy, right? Sometimes it can be helpful finding people that are similar to you. I'm Klavier Gavin, musician and attorney at law. I have a lot of musician friends and a lot of lawyer friends, like this one very loud lawyer I met at a park one day." Apollo snorted at the reference. "These are the labels I would like to define me. My sexuality is a part of me, yes, but it is not something I would like to define me as much as everything else. It is simply who I am, does that make sense?"

Apollo hummed in understanding, and the breath that Klavier didn't know he was holding was released. Apollo finally began to wrap his arms around Klavier as well.

"Though, I have heard from a few colleagues that your ass looks very nice, and according to my research, I'd have to agree," Klavier teased, and Apollo couldn't help but laugh some more. He then took one look at the clock and panicked. He was going to be late for court!

Picking up the now cold toast from the toaster, he quickly inhaled some breakfast and ran out to grab his bike. Klavier waved him goodbye from their patio with a coffee mug in his hand a gentle smile on his face. Apollo quickly waved back and began pedaling as hard as he could to the courthouse.

Along the way, Apollo took notice of a few more tabloid magazines. Some of them had headlines of "Klavier sex deviant?" in reference to last night's comment. However, Apollo just had to laugh to himself as he hurried on his way.

Whatever the people thought, Apollo knew one thing for sure. Klavier loved him for him, and while it might be disappointing to know that Klavier didn't love him exactly like Apollo loved Klavier, it was nice to know that Klavier gave him his own unique brand of love. It was a love he didn't give to many others, and Apollo cherished every bit of that.

Besides, Apollo probably had the sexiest man he knew as a boyfriend, and that was enough for him.

* * *

 **A/N:** I personally really love the thought of asexual Klavier. I don't know, I just think it fits him very well.

Again, we go for something of established relationship bumps in Apollo and Klavier's relationship. As someone who identifies as asexual (I like to say queer most of the time), this has always been something on my mind. People are allowed to express their sexualities any way they want. For me, it was not at all. I am not scared nor am I ashamed of who I am. Some people like telling others that they're gay. I like telling people that I like anime and science. Different interests, different groups of people to know. I'd like to think that this is how Apollo would find out about Klavier.

Thank you for reading!


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